Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Smoking Killz

Read at your own risk

Smoking is a dangerous game.

My target readers of this post are smokers - sporadic smokers, rare smokers, occasional smokers, regular smokers, chain smokers and people who smoke like a chimney. Well, if yu don't smoke also ... that's fine! but this will be best interpreted and comprehended by smokers and to an extent doctors who ultimately give the treatment for those smokers who eventually evolve into patients.

Are you aware of the latest anti tobacco warning issued by the health ministry and all the fuss it created? After all the hubbubs, smoking is still alive and kicking and ITC is doing a better business in spite of recession. I bet that a majority of smokers have not seen this warning yet. This is because the first four class of smokers hardly buy a complete cigarette pack. Most of them buy cigs in bits and pieces and for that reason the new ordinance just doesn't wash.

Moreover, frankly speaking, with two black lungs and a danger symbol it doesn't scare enuf, well at least it won't scare the smokers, i guess. Was it an intention to scare the kids? I think the government got a serious misconception from somewhere that the number of children who smoke is on a rise. Further, I don't think the upcoming gen Y Indian children would get frightened by this kinda stupid ads and the ancient symbol of danger. I believe a snap of Raju would have served the purpose better.

If the real intention is to drive out smoking we should constructively and categorically analyze why the customer smokes. Some of the reasons which i have heard from people around me and eavesdropping;

[1] Men smoke weed and fly. Waana be the real man!

[2] "I am a software developer." Smoking relieves stress ( as put by one of my friend).

[3] Smoking helps in making friends and hence it is one of the things that people spring for(sounds idiotic? Yes of course, I know!).

[4] Smoking helps in discolouring pink lips which makes men look like a gay (hush! very much personal).

[5] Tea, coffee and snacks in Bangalore are expensive where as cigarettes costs just 3.5 Rs. It's a good breakfast, lunch , brunch , dinner and supper.

[6] Cigarettes act as catalysts for emptying the bowels (phew!).

[7] Cigarettes boost the dose of alcoholic kick. Put the ash in alcohol, drink, pray for a healthy liver and black out!

[8] Oxygen Cylinder is a sobriquet for Cigarette. This is what smokers say
(and if by any rare chance any doctor utilizes cigarette instead of O2 cylinder on any patient who is down in the ventilator room on the sidelines of this post, it will kill that patient instantly)

Sigh!

Sometimes my way of writing might damage your senses . Please don't take my articles too seriously.